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Sometimes--do you lie awake at night? Thinking about "what you might have been"? Watching the procession of your past life move like a cinema film before your eyes? Reading anew the whole tale of time born and dead, a few joys, many tears perhaps, and long barren years of drought? Waiting for something bigger, better, brighter to turn up? But it has not come yet. The road is hard and the field you are tilling is sterile.

-- Notebooks Category 1: Overview of the Quest > Chapter 2 : Its Choice > # 305