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The ego knows that if profoundly concentrated attention is directed toward ascertaining its true nature the result will be suicidal, for its own illusory nature would be revealed. This is why it opposes such a meditation and why it allows all other kinds.

When the ego is brought to its knees in the dust, humiliated in its own eyes, however esteemed or feared, envied or respected in other men's eyes, the way is opened for Grace's influx. Be assured that this complete humbling of the inner man will happen again and again until he is purified of all pride. (8.4.430)

Out of this ego-crushing, pride-humbling experience he may rise, chastened, heedful, and obeisant to the higher will. (8.4.431)

-- Notebooks Category 8: The Ego > Chapter 5 : Detaching from The Ego (Part 2) > # 396